[abbysmom]

We have a 15 month old V who suffers from severe separation anxiety. We recently got her a playmate thinking this would help. Its has help and its also caused some new behavior issues. Abby is now throwing tantrums. I will give her and her sister, Chloe each the same treat. After about 5 minutes or so, Abby begins to cry for Chloe's treat, barks, pulls on the blankets, paws at Chloe or all together takes her treat from her. This is only done with treats, not food or water or being protective of her bed. Also, for some reason today Abby decided to pee right in the middle of our bed. I don't know if this is an act of resentment or what. But she has never done this in the past. Chloe has been with us for a month now and I have tried to make Abby feel as much as possible that she is still our #1 baby. Any words of advise or wisdom in dealing with a jealous V and her sister's treats?

 

[sarahaf]

My guess, and I'm by no means an expert, is that it's just an adjustment period for her. She isn't used to having to share resources (treats) and thinks she'd better hoard up what she can. To some degree, that's how the species is wired. I bet she'll get used to it if she doesn't get her way. Some behavioral perspectives I've read suggest that we humanize a lot of what dogs do when we use words like "resentment" to describe their motives, and that they're less complicated and more dependent on simple associative learning (e.g., behavior-consequence) than we are. I will say Rosie did something very, very strange to us, which is that the first time she was left briefly unattended in a basement room that's used as a guest room, she hopped on the bed and peed on it. Weird. We couldn't figure that one out other than that it's a part of the house she doesn't normally go in, and she didn't see it as a no-elimination zone.

 

[fiona long]

no advice but something to cheer you up - my friends two children are called abby and chloe and to be honest dont sound too diffrent from the dogs hahaaa!

 

[Mercutio]

As a matter of curiosity, what does Chloe do when Abbey throws her tantrums? Does she give up her treat or try to keep them? How do you actually give them their treats? Do they have to sit or anything or do you put them in separate bowls?

Is it possible that by trying to make Abbey feel special you might be accidentally encouraging her? I don't really know - it's just a thought.

Two of my friends moved in together both with grown dogs and it took ages (over a year) before they were all comfortable together so it might take awhile.

Keep at it, I'm sure you will find a way to all live together happily.

 

[gunnr]

You need to intervene in the treat issue, even if it means no treats for awhile. Make sure that each dog gets it's treat, and the other doesn't steal it. You may even have to crate Abby and Chloe when the treats are given. You may also try smaller treats that can be readily eaten without having to break them up to chew them first.We also have two females, and one, Gunnr, is more dominant than the other, Tika. They are not allowed to take each others treats, end of story.
It's up to Abby and Chloe to determine their relative position on the social ladder, and other than an all out fight, you may just want let them work it out. Dogs understand who is above and below and don't harbor jealousy about it like a human would. For them it's normal, and it's actually healthier for them to establish their own position . Even though you are trying to treat Abby as #1. You will be better off in the long run ensuring that both are treated equally.
You are the "Top Dog", if you will, and both dogs have to understand and accept that on every level. In your social hierarchy it's healthier for both dogs to respect you as #1. If Chloe percieves your overt attention to Abby as submissive, she may interperet it as Abby being #1 and you being #2 and possibly try to place herself between you and Abby. In essence she will compete with you and not Abby.

In Sarahf's post, she used the word "humanize" to describe some behavioral observations. The word Anthromorphism would be the same as humanize, in that we attribute human emotion and response to non human creatures. Dogs don't "get even" with malice or forethought, but they will act out, and experience emotional behaviors. ( This is validated by university studies, though anyone with a dog could have told them that dogs do have emotional responses, without a goverment funded study.) Both Abby, and eventually Chloe, may begin to act out negatively to gain attention.

It will take time for everyone to understand their roles, but you'll get there.