With all of my puppies, I have always put a towel over the crate door, and would sleep next to the crate. Every time they made noise, I would just lightly tap on the crate and tell them to be quiet in a low, calming tone of voice. The object was to make them believe that I was always right outside the crate, and that they weren't alone. It took a few nights.
I'm a little uncertain as to what "bed time" means? Puppies will need to sleep some 14+ hours a day. It could possibly be that she is over stimulated.What does her "typical day" look like?
For the first few weeks I have a puppy, they spend a lot of time going in and out of the crate. I want them to mentally "not believe" that they are never going to be let out.
In the crate for awhile, then out the door to go to the bathroom. Come in and play, maybe eat, back in the crate, and back out the door. etc, etc. I try to create as much structure for them as I can so that they can become familiar with the pattern of what will become their day.
I don't agree, nor disagree, with the Vet. My dogs have never slept in our bedroom, or bed, but if you have to do it to bridge the gap, then bring the crate into the bedroom. Later on she'll mature and adjust to wherever you put the crate, but for now,,,,,
Right now is the time you need to prioritize with her as the most important time you will have with your puppy. She will live a long life, but weeks 8-12 are critical. It's a very short window unfortunately, and has to be leveraged as much as possible. The foundation will be set during this time.
You'll never beat a lesson into a dog, you just beat desire out.